25 October 2010

I really hadn’t intended to do an entry today but I suspect that they were getting rather ‘samey’ but then I realised I should perhaps have mentioned last night’s video which was so ‘none-me’ as to be of interest to the reader. It is, or was – as we were too tired to finish it last night – a film about infamous street graffiti artists, the best-known of whom is Banksy. This particular individual has achieved international recognition and some sort of fame amongst the cognoscenti, but, amazingly enough, despite now putting on, presumably  legally, vast exhibitions of his work in various parts of the world, and even making this particular film, Exit Through The Gift Shop, he has managed to conceal his true identity from all but a small inner circle., Not really my sort of film but one that has a certain fascination to it and I am certainly interested to see how it pans out.

I made the decision to mention this and therefore needed an entry today. Then, while I was having a rest this afternoon, I began to question why I was writing the blog at all. But then, of course, I  have explained and justified  this, in the introduction to the blog.  The blog is – no more, no less than a light hearted daily diary, from the time that I was diagnosed with Motor Neurone Disease to my deterioration and oblivion,

Whilst resting, my thoughts then turned to the whole concept of ‘the diary’ and my mind went back to the records I commenced as a young person and teenager over 60 years ago.  I remember reading some of them, when I was  compiling my autobiographical notes, only to find them mundane to the point of boring and totally lacking in imagination. No deep philosophical questions about life; or why we are here; where we are going; or how we get there; and-all the things that the young man should be asking himself. Instead they were just a record of the nothingness of an unimaginative young man. Having said that, I was imaginative, I did read a great deal, I did think a great deal, I questioned a great deal, then why did I not record any of these rather deeper thoughts in my diaries at the time?

Anyone who has read this particular blog from beginning to end – and for such tenacity they earn my admiration  – would have observed that it began by dealing with the fairly mundane, matter of fact, daily report on my health, or my reaction, or that of my family and friends, to the news of MND. Gradually, however it began to incorporate  more detached philosophical matters affecting us all, whether sick or healthy. These are to be found in poetry, in records of discussion programmes on the radio or just something that I have observed which has touched me deeply at the time. Also the reader will observe that for some unknown and unexplained reason I began to include, what to some, might appear to be  inconsequential rubbish such as the game of cricket or rugby, admittedly both of which I enjoy. Who knows, these comments might well appeal to others. In effect, I have enjoyed allowing myself the privilege of dealing with matters totally irrelevant to the blog itself. Maybe this is the reason why it seems to be achieving some sort of modest success and the number of hits will shortly go through the million mark.

Today whilst I took my afternoon rest, I wondered whether someone will ever take the trouble to consider publishing a distilled version of this record -  perhaps as, The Professor’s Diary – not, of course, Mark Cato’s Diary. I am no Samuel Pepys or Anne Frank, but who knows with some savage pruning there may be left the essence of a thought-provoking tome. I will not be able to write such a book but maybe one of my grandchildren, or great-grandchildren, or even a ghost writer, will be inspired to do so. I would suggest that they interweave passages from the 800 odd pages of Autobiographical Notes already written into it.

The fascination is, that none of us, least of all me, know, how this blog will end. Will it be with a sudden crash  on the main highway of life – an unexpected demise – or will it slide off into a quiet side turning,  grinding slowly to a halt?

To return to the mundane, and therefore not to lose sight of the purpose of this blog, (to inspire others including those who might have physical or mental problems), I slept far better last night and am getting closer to normal, albeit a little short of breath when I lie down.

Incidentally, we did (almost) finish Exit Through the Gift Shop, and the hero, Thiery or  Mr. Brain Wash (MBW), as he preferred to be called, caused a minor sensation in Los Angeles running a vast exhibition of modern Art. The citizens of Los Angeles loved it to the point of spending  over US $1 million in the first week. The value of a piece of art  is what someone is prepared to pay for it. As you might imagine, MBW was not over popular with the more established street graffiti artists, many of whom were internationally renowned.

A second ‘incidentally’ I remember that this is the day that Boots, the Chemist, appraise my healthcare product. Will I receive another reasoned rejection, and if so, where, if anywhere, do I go from there?

Tags: Thailand