16 September 2009
This evening, my lovely and I went to the Fenwick Elliott Garden Party on the roof of Derry & Toms. in the High Street Kensington. It really is a very beautiful garden which brought to mind the Hanging Gardens of Babylon which I imagine could have been similar. I was fortunate enough to visit Babylon […]
Love on Mars
The year is 2222 and Mike and Maureen land on Mars after accumulating enough Frequent Flier miles. They meet a Martian couple and are talking about all sorts of things. Mike asks if Mars has a stock market, if they have laptop computers, how they make money, etc. Finally, Maureen brings up the subject of […]
Starting a Lecture
This is one of the many devices I use at the beginning of my lectures in China in order to grab the students’ attention. Sometimes I start in Latin, other times with a quotation from my illustrious namesake, Marcus Cato the Elder. On this occasion I started  by asking for all the idiots in the […]
Norfolk Joke 1
Boy Arthur and George were on the way down to the Cricketers public house, one evening, when they saw a young lady, by the side of the road, with a bicycle with a flat tyre. Arthur said to George, “You go on down to the pub and line up the beer and I’ll stay and […]
Cowboy and the Bishop
Speaking of options reminds me of the Bishop and Texan cowboy who found themselves sitting next to each other on a ‘plane journey. After take-off the stewardess asked the cowboy if he would like a drink. He ordered bourbon on the rocks. She then turned to the bishop and asked if he would like the […]
Elephants
A man sitting in the corner of a railway carriage kept tearing pieces out of his  newspaper, screwing them into small balls and then throwing the out of the window. A man sitting opposite became curious and asked him why he was doing it. “It keeps the elephants awayâ€, the man said. “But there aren’t […]
Getting the Wrong End of the Stick
A man came home and found a naked man in the house. His wife said, “it’s all right darling. The man is a nudist who just dropped in to use the telephoneâ€.